Tuesday, July 19, 2011

If you are planning an epic night that might see the sunrise, here's your advice...

I once met a girl for all of 5 minutes down in Queenstown, New Zealand who gave me some very Good Advice for the on-the-go party animal, which many of you are.

From a lack of a picture of her, here's a picture of Queenstown:


Queenstown, New Zealand. Home of the Bungee Jump.

So anyway, this chick said to me, as she was heading out for the evening:

"I never go anywhere without my jumper, my sunnies, and my toggs."  -Kiwi Chick

Translation:

Jumper: This means hoody. A cozy sweatshirt is always good to have on hand when going out for a big night. You never know where you're going to end up when you might need an extra layer for warmth or something to casual-down in at the end of your evening. Furthermore, if you end up crashing on your buddy's floor or sofa, it can double as a pillow or a blanket. Let us not forget, as well, how useful a hoody can be when it's time for that time-honored tradition: The Walk of Shame.

Sunnies: These are sunglasses. Shades, man. Even if you're going out at night, you may not technically know when your "night" will end. See above for further uses i.e. Walk of Shame.

Toggs: This means bathing suit. It's obviously useful advice for this time of year, but, hey, you never know when life may present you with a hot tub. It could happen in any season. Always be prepared.

Thursday, July 14, 2011

A Self Recognizing Blog

I go to my friend Andrew for professional advice quite a bit.

Yesterday he said:

"It's good to keep a smart, well edited blog... because your boss or potential employer will read it." - Andrew Stein

Good. Advice.

For the sake of hilarity, here's a picture of Andrew and a pie:

Tuesday, July 5, 2011

Today: Safety

Some advice comes in the form of well-placed instructions.

For instance, I once held in my hand and lit a firework that had a label on it that read:

"Do not hold in hand and light." - Firework

I have a scar on my stomach to attest to the value of this advice.

Here's another example:


Follow instructions, folks. Instructions are Good Advice, and may save you from swan-diving onto concrete or blowing yourself up.

Sunday, July 3, 2011

Tonight: Stacy

My friend Stacy is a fashion editor. She just completed a book that will be published this fall about the style icon, Michael Jackson.

Today she said:

"If you're having a bad hair day, go buy a cool hat". - Stacy Appel

Good Advice.

She then recommended Target for purchasing cool hats.

Also Good Advice.

Friday, July 1, 2011

Let's Be Practical

Good Advice doesn't need to be earth-shatteringly, life-changingly profound. It just needs to be useful.
Here's a good example:

"One-legged hugs are dangerous".  - Alex Schuetz

He declared this nugget of wisdom after we tried hugging eachother while each standing on one leg. It's hard to do. We fell over. Lesson learned. Good advice produced.

I don't have Alex's permission to display a photo of his image, because he's camping this weekend, and  hence unavailable to sign off on my blog post, but I've always thought this window art kind of looked like him:



Other Good Advice can have this kind of simplicity, but have a much broader spectrum of application. An example of such came from a lovely man I dated my freshmen year of college, Tom.

Tom, like me, was extremely forgetful when it came to his personal effects. He said to me once, while carefully backing away from an ATM machine:

"Before you leave someplace, take a look around and make sure you have everything you came with."
-Tom

If you have ever left your ATM card inside an ATM machine, or left your wallet sitting on it's ledge, or left a shopping bag on the sidewalk beside it, (and admit it, you have), then really, you know that is terrific advice. It's plain, it's simple, and it's constantly useful. I consider it daily, and it's nice to think of lovely Tom when I do.

When it comes to good advice, thinking of the person that delivered it to you helps as much as the words themselves. For example, one of my very best friends, Kelly Warrington, told me when I was having one of my nervous fits about going away on some ridiculous travel adventure or another:

"Meg, keep your wits about you." - Kelly Warrington

Now, we've all heard that one before, but picturing Kelly, as her constantly classy and fabulous self when remembering this advice helps when applying it. Please experience this effect by saying these words in your head while viewing this picture of Kelly:

"(Your Name), keep your wits about you."


Got your wits about you? Of course you do. Thanks, Kelly.

Other pieces of Good Advice can be equally simple, but have very vague daily application. In fact, Good Advice may not actually be that useful, but still good to keep in mind. My friend Alpheus, who was one of my favorite eccentric buddies from Radford, Virginia, was full of stange ideas. We're talking about a guy that organized a basketball team for the intermural league, and named it "Steely Dan". It's been eleven years, and I still think that's funny. Anyway, when I left Radford, he wrote me in a farewell card:

"Go get 'em, Meg. You're a mammal." -Alpheus

True. Positive. Motivating...

 ...I'm still not totally sure what it means, but this is one of my favorite pieces of Good Advice ever. 

Welcome To Best Advice Ever This Week! This Week: Marty

It's in my nature to absorb good advice, and throughout my brief life I've filed away in my memory quite a stock of other people's smart ideas. It seems that well-put wisdom can come from anybody at anytime, you just have to keep your ears peeled, so to speak. This blog will include the best advice ever from the past as well as whatever I've picked up this week.

I decided to start this blog because of my friend Marty. Marty, a 22-year-old free-spirit-tattoo-artist-come-busboy, who may or may not be chemically enhanced at all times, (hard to tell) seems, despite his tendency to ramble on a bit, to spontaneously spew forth tit-bits of entertaining wisdom. Here are just a few that I can recall at the moment, but I suspect I'll remember more, and he'll keep producing...

"It's all good. As long as you don't hit your head." - Marty

Oddly enough, he got a concussion the next day.

"Tea is better than the internet."  - Marty

This is both true and good to keep in mind when considering what you do with your spare time.

"It's good to change things up sometimes." - Marty

We do indeed get stuck in our ruts too easy in life. Take it from a guy that averages 2 new tattoos a week: change isn't as scary as it often seems.


This is Marty. Surely he is conjuring up a deep thought in this moment... or he might just be taking a break from doodling on the table. Again, hard to tell.